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(04/29/11 2:54am)
With graduation looming, members of the class of 2011 may be grappling with their imminent new roles as “real” people. While the College doesn’t necessarily provide definitive guidance for this, it does provide graduates with an identity in relation to itself: alumni.
As an alumnus of the College, the resources available to you are different than as a student. According to Shawn Sivy, director of Network and Technical Services at the College, students are shifted to alumni status after graduation as part of the Identity Management System (TIMS) — the program that manages students’ network identities. This translates to terminated access to the College’s network.
Alumni retain access to PAWS and myTCNJ in order to request and view transcripts, Sivy said in an e-mail. However, he also said that only students “actively taking courses” can access SOCS.
The anticipated conversion of student e-mail accounts to Gmail — planned for May 18 — is being done with alumni in mind.
“We think it’s really important to keep a connection to our alumni and Google Apps for Education will allow us to do that as well,” the College’s website says. “With this change, our alumni can keep a tcnj.edu e-mail account for life.”
Students who graduated in May 2008 still possess Zimbra accounts, Sivy said, which will be changed automatically to Gmail accounts.
Alumni who don’t currently use Zimbra accounts will be given the opportunity to sign up for Google Apps this summer, according to Sivy. He also said other services may be available to alumni in the future.
“We are considering additional services for the future that may be beneficial to alumni, such as access to the campus wireless network,” he said.
As an alumnus, access to the Library changes as well. After graduation students can register with Alumni Affairs in Green Hall 211 for their alumni cards, which grant alumni library privileges, outlined at tcnj.edu/~library/info/borrowing.html.
According to Taras Pavlovsky, dean of the Library, access to databases such as EBSCOhost and JSTOR, with which the College currently has license agreements, ends upon graduation, as dictated by these contracts. However, as the College is a public institution, alumni, like anyone, are able to walk into the Library and use the facilities. According to Pavlovsky, the reason the College doesn’t provide alumni with access to these databases is because, financially, it can’t.
“We encourage you (students) to be life-long learners … If there were a way to provide it (databases) we would,” he said.
Pavlovsky said that the Library plans to incorporate a citation-generating program, RefWorks, into its repertoire of databases, which will be accessible to alumni as well, as the company’s licensing agreement includes alumni as registered users. Currently, students can visit the Library’s website to sign up for a trial of the program.
For additional information regarding alumni resources, visit the Alumni Association Benefits and Services page at community.tcnj.edu.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(04/29/11 2:41am)
Living with people is like cleaning out your fridge. It’s all about compromise.
In our house, the ceremonious purging of our refrigerator is an affair, a debacle of debates of expiration dates and “does this smell edible?” It is also an inconsistent monthly — bi-monthly if we are feeling particularly adventurous — event. On these holidays, heard in the hobbit kitchen are: sounds of disgust, laughter and a serious discourse on maximizing space, a consensus that the Brita Filter can, indeed, go unrefrigerated … in order to make room for more beer. I mean, replacing water with alcohol has been done before, so in a way, we are practically replicating something holy. We are a religious house, indeed.
The first week we lived in our house, the fridge was full of rotting food. Yes, in a way, it was an omen. Things in the beginning — as you may remember from my previous articles — were a little rough with food wars, sleeping (or lack of sleeping) rituals, critters and oh, that pesky, this-house-is-falling-apart-around-us thing. In the first semester, we discovered rotting vegetables in the drawers, which we each, in turn, threw out without disclosing. We raged silently about the dwindling level of Parmesan cheese that mysteriously disappeared after only a handful of our own uses but retaliated by snagging a smackerel of someone’s something else. Created a warped sense of justice. Left passive-aggressive notes. Rearranged with reckless abandon to make room for our own items.
As time passed, we learned to work with what we had. We waged a marginally successful war against mice, labeled our food, worked out sleeping situations and for the most part, discovered a sense of each other’s space. Even in the fridge. The too-tiny-for-necessities-and-cheap-alcohol fridge in which we each, unofficially, eventually claimed a space that was our own. A hobbit fridge for our hobbit house. We’ve managed to make it work. When the fridge is overflowing, unmanageable, unlivable, eventually something has to be done.
Ok, so we aren’t exactly the most organized bunch as a house of self-proclaimed arteeeests. It may take us longer to address issues head-on. We may leave bean sprouts at the back of the fridge for ages, whisper about the rotting bean sprouts’ presence behind the bean sprouts’ back, until finally blurting out that “The bean sprouts are a problem!” Then, it turns out, the apologetic owner of the bean sprouts wasn’t aware. And then the bean sprouts are no big deal, really. Easily discarded. Easily replaced. Then we parley over salvable leftovers versus the beginnings of a new civilization of green fuzzy creatures. We’ve tried our best to compromise and converse, even if it is a slimy, uncomfortable business.
As I approach my final weeks as a college student and final months as a tenant, the fridge is looking pretty good. Considerably more contained, organized, still primitive but relatively fresh, no odorous remnants of the previous tenants’ “present.” But soon someone else’s stuff will occupy my spot in the fridge. After all, I’m the jerk that is graduating early. Though I will not miss the cave crickets and the broken … everything, I will miss my space in the hobbit house and most especially the lovely, (crazy), kindhearted friends I shared it with.
(04/21/11 8:02pm)
You’ve waited two long years for this. Languishing in your dormitory, lamenting how you can’t, yet, partake in the exotic world known only to those older than 20. You’d sit by your window — this scenario doesn’t quite work if you have an indoor Eickhoff room, though you probably do your fair share of window watching — and contemplate the rollicking time, (or if you are an art or English major, the potential Gatsby-themed ‘musings’) you’re missing.
Ok, so hopefully it wasn’t this dramatic of an experience. I hope you went outside or read a book instead. But most likely, in some capacity, you were excited by the prospect of drinking — legally. The possibilities for activity expand infinitely — you can now have a beer in the Rat. It’s like your whole life has led up to this gloriously mediocre moment.
There are some crucial differences between drinking legally on campus and in your off-campus home. For one, on campus, you need to make sure you are not remotely close to anyone who is not 21. Off campus, there isn’t a CA or RA to check — disclaimer: Providing alcohol to minors is illegal. This being said, what you really need to worry about is next-door neighbors and whether or not they will call the police on you if they even suspect a potential “gathering” at your residence. Be smart. Don’t anger the natives. If done right, hosting parties/hanging out with your friends at your house can be a lot of fun, just make sure you reasonably contain it.
As a 21 year old, an unfortunate right of passage is to visit the local clubs and bars. KatManDu, Firkins, Slocum’s, the likes. Now I’m not going to try arguing that these establishments aren’t enjoyable. You get a free T-shirt at Firkins if you go on your 21st birthday. Who doesn’t like free stuff? Aside from that, I fail to see the appeal. If you enjoy over-paying for alcohol, being surrounded by intoxicated people you don’t know and listening to music you don’t even like, power to you. Already living off campus, I just think it’s counterintuitive. At home, you can save money, control the music and spend time with people you actually know/like. What’s stopping you from dancing in your house?
Granted, just as cabin fever easily infects in the dorm rooms, you’ll want to get out of your house once in a while. I get it. But I think we are a generation that relies too heavily on changing locations just to snap pictures and provide proof of “fun” on Facebook. “See? I’m in a dark room with sweaty peers. Notice the beer in my hand? Crazy night.” If you can easily replicate a situation at home (sans the perspiring strangers), then it isn’t worth spending the money or dignity. There are so many more worthwhile ways to spend your money. Perhaps in ways that enable you and your friends to actually talk at normal volumes, rather than screaming over crappy music. Just because you’re 21, doesn’t mean everything you do that doesn’t involve homework needs to incorporate drinking. And when it does, isn’t it better to be surrounded by people you know, who you can hear talking, in a setting conducive to actually remembering what was said between you?
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(04/14/11 1:43am)
Five Lions of the men’s outdoor track and field team achieved record book status Saturday, on the second day of the New Jersey Invitational hosted at the College. The 10-team event, the first home meet of the season, proved to be an impressive showing by the women’s and men’s outdoor track and field teams.
Sophomore Julio Alorro cleared a height of 4.66 meters, breaking the College’s previous pole vault record — an 11-year-old record, according to head coach Phil Jennings — on Saturday.
“He’s (Alorro) really worked hard this year, and has been steadily improving throughout the indoor season as well,” Jennings said in an e-mail.
Alorro said in an e-mail that his performance was an exciting accomplishment, and it was a direct result of using any free moment to practice, as well as to study other pole vaulters’ techniques.
“I felt a lot of excitement obviously for breaking a school record that’s been up since 2000,” Alorro said. “I prepared for it just like most athletes, putting a lot of time in practice in between classes and watching a lot of YouTube videos on pole vault.”
With a time of 3:21.62 in the 4x400 relay, the combined efforts of junior Christopher Medina, sophomore Alex Brown, freshman Michael Spekhardt and sophomore Steven D’Aiutolo, also made a change in the school’s record book.
Also collaborating for first place status, the men’s team in the 4x100 relay and women’s team in the 4x400 relay claimed first. The men’s team consisted of senior Kyle Gilroy, sophomore Kyle Magliaro and juniors Medina and Robert Jiggetts, while the women’s team included seniors Miriam Khan, Alexandra Tomaselli, Meryl Wimberley and freshman Emily Kulcyk.
The Lions seized a number of first place feats in field events. Senior Alexander Necovski took first in the shot put throw (13.23 meters), discus throw (40.92 meters) and the hammer throw (44.24 meters). For the women’s Lions on Friday, senior Sarah Wehrhan placed first in these same categories, with distances of 11.88 meters, 36.96 meters and 45.12 meters, respectively.
The lady Lions consistently dominated the higher ranks of these events, with senior Brianna Brennan taking first in the javelin throw with 35.90 meters and freshman Emily Skalko, placing first in pole vault with a distance of 2.59 meters. Sophomore Mary Chismar placed third in shot put with 11.39 meters, and junior Emma Tucci took second with 35.06 meters.
Individual performances also contributed to the Lions’ solid showing. With a time of 8:40.43, senior Dennie Waite won first place in the 3000-meter run.
For two players the invitational garnered NCAA qualifying times. Kulcyk achieved NCAA marks with a time of 1:03.99 in the 400-meter hurdles. Gilroy earned NCAA marks in the 110-meter hurdles (15.02) and 400-meter hurdles.
When asked what he anticipates for the remainder of the season, Jennings said the teams will likely see improved results as spring emerges and the weather is more conducive to practice.
“Our athletes certainly like to run at home, in front of family and friends, and at the familiar facility that they practice on daily. That in itself helps bring out solid performances in the team,” Jennings said. “However, I expect that the weather improves, as we get in better shape, and as the season progresses toward our championships we’ll see improved performances from all event areas.”
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(04/14/11 1:15am)
As a College student — and a human being — I find myself confronted with the illogical on a daily basis. Yet, this is a fairly liberal-minded place, I think. Generally speaking, the College population is accepting — in the past it’s banded together against close-minded outside protestors flailing bibles and preaching hate and supported classmates in world and social prejudice-breaking records.
Because I am in this sheltered environment, the discriminatory beliefs existent on “the outside” strike me as anachronistic, akin to Twilight Zone scenarios. You mean there are still people who think everyone doesn’t deserve equal rights? Really?
It is perhaps for this reason that I am completely dumbfounded by the near government shutdown over Planned Parenthood funding. “SNL” couldn’t script a parody of this for Weekend Update more ridiculous than the real thing. I mean really! Really?!
Silly me to think that the importance of Planned Parenthood was common knowledge, that it doesn’t just administer abortions, but actually provides numerous family services. Not to beat a dead horse with the mantra of pro-choice advocates, “If you don’t believe in abortions, then don’t have one!” but it would be extremely easy for the Republicans who attempted to limit funding to Planned Parenthood to follow this, as a majority of them are male. According to nytimes.com, Republicans sought to re-appropriate federal funding from Planned Parenthood to other family planning organizations and state health departments to use at their discretion, essentially meaning that states headed by pro-life advocates will opt to exclude Planned Parenthood. They lost on this policy but were ultimately able to reinstate a policy that prevents Washington D.C. from using locally raised taxes to aid poor women in getting abortions.
Republicans fighting for decreased funding were able to use the argument as a bargaining chip for a $38 billion in federal spending cuts. They most likely assumed that the Planned Parenthood battle was not theirs to be entirely won — yet (gods, forbid!) — so they used it as a pawn to force opposition into other concessions. Oh sure, democracy is founded largely on negotiations, but partisanship turns it into frenzy of taking hostages, dangling threats to acquire the ridiculous helicopter-stocked-with-a- lifetime-supply-of-Jello demands. What does this say about how our government works? Is it really just a strategic game of, “What can we get the other side to agree to?” Whether or not Republicans believed they’d emerge fully victorious on the Planned Parenthood issue —though they were to a degree, as abortion funding was restricted in Washington — the fact that they were able to thrust such an essential organization into economic peril is terrifying. Still more frightening: the reality of how vulnerable we are to government shutdowns. Can we really afford such a possibility?
Granted, I am still very much a part of the college “bubble.” Perhaps I am missing something crucial to justify this nonsense. Maybe there’s an unseen reason justifying the Republicans’ desire to eliminate federal funding to Planned Parenthood. It’s possible that the near government shutdown is just evidence that democracy is working. Until I graduate, though, my only (coherent, non-raging) response can be: Really?!
(04/14/11 12:26am)
To resign the lease or to not resign the lease? It’s a question that comes with sentimental and nightmarish baggage. Remember the horrible battle with pests? The draft that prevents the house temperature from exceeding 65 degrees? The absentee landlord? The broken … everything? What could possibly chain you to this place, when you know classmates who live in palaces? (If you don’t think a full-sized kitchen could ever make you cry in face of its glorious cabinet space, try living in a hobbit house for a year.) All signs point to fleeing, bringing you one step closer to whatever convoluted visions of college-versions of suburbia bliss you may harbor — complete with dinner parties and keeping up with the Joneses (Kitases, in my case).
But, wait, all your shit is here.
Let’s be practical. Given the option to leave your possessions sprawled in their current disarray, you will probably be more willing to call the hobbit house home sweet home for another semester. Laziness has great powers of delusion — I mean, was it really that bad? And, of course, there are the memories. Remember when little Sally took her first steps before passing out by the coffee table? And that time that Tommy nearly burned down the house, baking brownies for the “bake sale”? Warped sitcom- inspired memories aside, you will likely accumulate some fond memories in your house, which will make moving out more difficult. Weighing the pros and cons of your current digs may become a balancing act between the logical and emotional.
Logical questions to ponder include:
• Is the house falling apart?
• How much is the rent? Is it potentially changing? Can this be negotiated?
• Is your landlord easy to talk to and does he/she respond to your concerns in a timely fashion?
• Is the space the right size for you and your housemates?
• Are there any reoccurring issues of pest infestation(s)?
• What are your current bills, and is there any possibility for reductions if you move to another residence?
• Are the alternative rental houses in the area more affordable?
Emotional considerations to ponder:
• You are settled in your current house. Your stuff has a designated place (the floor), and after months of better or worse conditions, this is a home away from home in at least some respect.
• Do you want to remain off campus, and do you want to risk the notorious housing lottery? Can you bear to return to Sodexo food after having your own kitchen for a year?
• Do you want to live with the same people?
• Have the “negative” aspects of your residence taken on an endearing quality for you? (i.e. Yes, it’s filth, but it’s my filth!)
• Are you comfortable where you are, in terms of safety and familiarity?
Ultimately, the question boils down to, can you see yourself living in the house another year, or would you prefer new surroundings? Make sure you talk to your housemates long before your landlord discusses bringing strangers (potential tenants) in to gawk at your natural habitat — you don’t want to feel pressured into making the decision last minute.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(03/24/11 12:00am)
Three months after a fatal collision involving 2010 alumnus Joseph Martin and a delivery contractor for The Trentonian, the College and a campus fraternity may face a multiparty lawsuit, according to the tort claim notice.
Florian Smith’s widow filed the notice of her intent to sue on Feb. 28, according to township attorney Maeve Cannon, against the College and the College’s Alpha Psi Chi chapter, as well as Hausdoerffer Hall, the Ewing Police Department, Ewing Police Officer Michael Pellegrino and the State of New Jersey.
According to the notice, Linda Smith — on behalf of herself and her 9-year-old daughter — is seeking $6 million in the proposed wrongful death lawsuit. Smith’s attorney, Norman Hobbie, could not be reached for comment.
The collision occurred on Dec. 5, when Martin’s 2001 green Audi crossed over the double yellow lines on Lower Ferry Road and hit Smith’s Ford Taurus at approximately 1:30 a.m., according to police reports. Both were found dead at the scene by Ewing Police.
The notice alleges that Martin, 23, had been drinking alcohol on campus prior to the crash, including an apartment in Hausdoerffer Hall, and departed “visibly intoxicated.” The notice charges the College, Hausdoerffer Hall and Alpha Psi Chi with “palpably unreasonable conduct,” derived from “failure to detain students who were under the influence” and its “failure to supervise, operate, maintain and control the premise.” According to The Times of Trenton, toxicology tests reported Martin’s blood alcohol level as .224. Stacy Schuster, executive director of College Relations, said the College “is precluded from commenting on pending litigation.”
Patrolman Michael Pellegrino is accused of violating state police pursuit policy by initiating a high-speed chase of Martin’s vehicle, subsequently causing Martin to crash, according to the notice. According to Cannon, Pellegrino didn’t violate pursuit procedures.
“There was no wrongdoing on the part of the township or the police officers,” she said.
The next stage of the proposed lawsuit is a 180-day waiting period, allowing named public entities to review the charges.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(03/23/11 11:30pm)
The world was your oyster between 11:30 a.m. and 1:30 p.m., the wondrous hours where you were granted the options of not only eating at Eickhoff, but three other dining locals, for “free.” Oh, how glorious meal equiv was … in theory. After moving off campus, you’ll learn that real options (non-Sodexo options) open with an oven, stove, cabinet space and (gasp) a full-sized refrigerator.
Initially, you may find that you have fallen too easily into routine. You buy the same groceries to make the same staple meals. Frozen foods have become your friend. As a vegetarian, I survived last semester on veggie burgers and omelets alone. With busy schedules and scarce spare time, feeding yourself with a varied and balanced diet may become secondary. Your sense of what constitutes a meal may become warped and disturbing. Peanut butter on crackers isn’t a meal. Goldfish (the cracker, not the animal, for you sick, literal minded people) don’t count as a side dish. As a general rule, Pop-Tarts and candy-hearts are not dinner material. Different colored sprinkles don’t qualify as “variety” in your diet. To avoid these misconceptions, try to incorporate the following methods and items into your kitchen.
Be a mad scientist
You don’t have to be an expert chef to try meals outside the Lean Cuisine box. I recommend investing in a cookbook of simple recipes. Several cookbooks cater specifically to the college crowd, a.ka. sleep-deprived, Ramen Noodle fiends and nocturnal creatures, providing simple, quick meals. One example is “The Starving Students’ Cookbook,” which?is really easy to use (I have the vegetarian version. Thanks, Mom).
Finding new recipes and then altering them according to your own tastes and supplies can yield awesome results. Recipes leave lots of room for experimentation. For instance, I make fakittos* (fake burritos), with fake ground beef (Bocca Meatless Ground Crumbles work well), peppers, onions, tofu, refried beans, taco seasoning, salsa and pepper jack cheese on a whole wheat tortilla. If I can do it, anyone can.
Hail, George Foreman
My George Foreman Grill saved my life. I’m not one to praise appliances (while I’m at it, toaster ovens are superior in every way to regular toasters. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise), but George fulfills so many culinary needs. Grilled sandwiches, vegetables, quesadillas, hamburgers (veggie burgers), bacon (fakon), burritos*, chicken (ficken?) and anything you are too lazy to fry, bake or cook; it’s magical. The grill is easy to clean and significantly cuts down on cooking time.
Stock up!
Coming from a family that talks with their hands, I am a firm believer in pasta. Having a consistent stock of noodles and sauce allows for backup, simple meals to make. And if you are feeling adventurous, you can always concentrate your energy on making different sauces (pesto is so simple and delicious. Opting for the premade cans is just a crime). Also stock up on canned soups or vegetable/chicken broth as another possible default meal. If you make the soup yourself, make it in large quantities, so that you can freeze and store the soup for future meals. Leftovers are your friends. Your only friends.
One beautiful thing about living off campus is that junk food isn’t readily available unless you make it so. There isn’t a freezer full of Ben & Jerry’s waiting to be swapped for points, nor are there trays full of Eickhoff crack cookies. If you don’t buy it, you can’t eat it. If you purchase healthy snacks (baby carrots are my personal crack), then that is what you will eat. I’ve survived this year without buying butter. Cool, right? I forgot to mention, that another result of living off campus is you will begin congratulating yourself on marginally admirable achievements and spend an unhealthy amount of time discussing groceries.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(03/16/11 10:19pm)
With great technology, comes great responsibility. Or, for some people, the ability to send nude photos to all their friends.
According to nj.com, the New Jersey Assembly passed a bill Monday that will allow first-time “sexters” to participate in an educational program rather than face prosecution, granting teens a chance to avoid blemishes on their permanent records. The program seeks to instruct students “on how the uniqueness of the Internet can produce long-term and unforeseen consequences after photographs are posted and the connection between cyber-bullying and the posting of sexual images,” the article states. The bill is awaiting Senate approval.
Students who sent or received nude or partial nude pictures have been charged in the past, emerging with a criminal record. It seems fitting that the consequences be reduced, especially in cases when students are on the receiving end of such a message. You can’t control what you are sent. In my high school, the taboo texts were debasingly dubbed “Pokémon Cards.” Students collected nude photos of girl classmates like the cult cards. Romantic. I’m not sure what possessed these girls to send pictures of themselves to immature high school boys in the first place, nor do I know if they were confident that the photos would remain solely in the possession of those they originally entrusted. In any case, I’m not sure exactly how effective “educating” teenagers will be, if it will really make kids think twice before pushing send. If they want to “sext,” if they simply must, they probably will. And if teenagers don’t yet realize that the Internet is viral, they probably never will.
Technology is perpetually creating conundrums for authority, new behavior or activity that eventually demands banning, problems that were not possible without certain new gadgets. The issues can be relatively harmless. In second grade it was Tamagotchis. Middle school it was cell phones; high school it was iPods. However, more serious implications have emerged with social networking sites and the prevalence of smart phones, making bullying and harassment that much easier. The way we interact is constantly evolving — or devolving depending on how you look at it — and the abuses of the enabling technologies, no doubt, will grow more inventive.
In one respect, I am glad that the legislature is wising up to changes in societal dynamics by attempting to establish channels of communication rather than resorting immediately to condemnation and punishment. On the other hand, will a slap on the wrist and “lessons” really accomplish anything? I’m not saying that I want “sexter” offenders to have first-time crimes follow them for the rest of their lives, but I’m not confident in this new bill to change much. It’s a valiant effort, but I don’t think it will be transformative.
(03/16/11 9:28pm)
When you live on campus, changes in season mean different clothes. Maybe a hat, an umbrella, colorful boots. Off campus, it can mean being trapped in the house or not being able to take a shower because the pipes froze. Being prepared for these changes is important to your ability to function and your mental stability.
Winter: When everything dies, including your happiness
Your house is going to be cold. Unspeakably cold. Consider getting a space heater for individual rooms so that you can keep the heat at reasonable temperatures and hopefully the bill at bay. Make sure you have the don’t-burn-the-house-down talk with your housemates so that they turn off their heaters before leaving the house.
Apparently it now snows heavily in central Jersey. Who knew? Unless you are incredibly fortunate to have a landlord that takes care of snow, you are going to need shovels and possibly road salt. Also, don’t assume that anyone is going to plough your road. Certain roads don’t exist to Ewing Township. On the off chance that conditions get bad enough that the roads are ploughed, make sure no one is parked in the street. Otherwise neighbors’ whose sides of the road weren’t ploughed may hate you forever. Your neighbors may gather in each other’s driveways and discuss their mutual hatred of the punk kids in the house with the inconsiderate car parked in the road.
Also, since your car no longer enjoys the shelter of a parking garage, make sure you have an ice scraper handy and afford generous amounts of time to free your car from the icy elements.
Spring: Your bicycle and you
After moving off campus, my most treasured possession became something unusual — my bicycle.
Ideally, your off-campus digs will be within walking or bike riding distance from campus. As we are on the cusp of spring, the weather will soon be nice enough to abandon your gas monsters and enjoy fresh air before being trapped in the classroom. It’s better for your wallet, oh and that pesky global warming thing.
Your bike can also be a godsend for your physical and mental health. Parking at the College is a nightmare. Avoid near head-on collisions with maniac classmates in Lot 6 and arriving to class a frustrated, late mess. Plus, riding a bike makes you look more intelligent because you appear environmentally conscious, and people think you are at least trying to be physically fit. And since you’re on a bicycle — presumably with a destination — you don’t have talk to anyone to disprove these deductions. “Winning.”
Just be sure to invest in a sturdy lock because otherwise, your bike will be stolen, even if it’s a who-in-the-world-would-want-this contraption with handbrakes that don’t even work. It’s a scary world.
Summer: Hot, hot, hot
Remember those first few weeks of freshman year, when you not only had to adjust to sharing a small space with a stranger, but you were trying to hide the fact that you were sweating like crazy because August and dorm rooms are a horrible combination? Well, prepare to have hot-flash flashbacks. If you live in a sweltering hobbit house like me, things can get pretty swampy. Depending on your particular situation, window unit air conditioners are wonderful and not too expensive. It will spike the electric bill slightly, but will be comparatively small to the heating bill. It’s worth it.
Fall: Redemption
This is the baby bear porridge of seasons. Don’t even bother buying a rake. Enjoy the weather while it lasts. See? I can be positive.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(03/16/11 6:52pm)
Our favorite bands have the dual capacity to inspire and bitterly disappoint us.
My affair with Bright Eyes began a few years ago and has been less an interest than an obsession. Few artists have been able to capture and sustain my admiration as Conor Oberst. Unsurprisingly, his voice hasn’t been the primary luring factor (though he’s significantly improved from his 15–year-old-screeching-in-a-basement days). However, his lyrics, musicianship and the people he has collaborated with on the albums — from constants Mike Mogis and Nathaniel Walcott to the angelic appearance of Maria Taylor and Emmylou Harris — have created a constantly transforming genius. The progression of albums reflects growing maturity with changes in style, culminating in a movement from a bedlam of vocals and instrumentation to incorporations of brilliant orchestration and seamless transitions.
Admittedly, the level of angst on these albums has served as a source of attraction for me, but I will fight anyone who labels Bright Eyes as an “emo” band. Just because a song expresses negative emotions doesn’t make it emo. There’s a difference between melodrama and actually articulating the abstract, at times but not always (“Bowl of Oranges,” anyone?), horrible “things” we can feel as human beings. I will fight you.
I approached Bright Eyes’ newest endeavor, “The People’s Key” with both excitement and trepidation. “Cassadaga” was supposed to be Oberst’s final release under the Bright Eyes title. It was the ultimate conclusion, an offering to appease fans so Oberst could shed the depressed/slightly disturbed persona to embark on new projects, with a poignant and definitive period.
So, how do you treat an unplanned child? Would I find myself congratulating Conor Oberst with clenched teeth, thinking, “What have you done?”
The first time I listened to the album, I was prepared to go into mourning. I heard the voice of Denny Brewer, guitarist for the band Refried Icecream, opening the album and thought, “Why is John Goodman on this album?” I listened to “Shell Games” and was having Mystic Valley nightmares.
Sure I could detect shadows of albums past, but they were merely ghosts of their previous brilliance. Voice recordings are common-
place on opening tracks on Bright Eyes albums (“At the Bottom of Everything,” “A Spindle, A Darkness, A Fever, and A Necklace”), but who was this joker talking about Nazis for two minutes on “Firewall”? Also, clearly Oberst was operating under the impression that he wrote pop songs for Bright Eyes albums. I felt myself not-so-secretly wishing — just as I’d lamented after seeing him perform with the Mystic Valley Band — he was depressed again, so that he could write good music. Love makes you wish horrible things on people.
Then I listened to the album again. And again. And again. I’m thoroughly addicted. “The People’s Key” doesn’t quite feel like a concluding album but more of a transition, a phoenix rising from the ashes of its predecessors, preparing for the next thing. Yes, some lines still make me cringe, such as in “Haile Selassie”: “Pilgrim across the water/We are the same brother” — NO.
However, traces of “Digital Ash In a Digital Urn,” in terms of style and electronic sound, flow with Oberst’s more recent folk influences beautifully. Though the poppy qualities of “Shell Games” and “Jejune Stars” initially horrified me, they infected my brain and never left (nor will I let them). The harmonies on “Triple Spiral” are facemelting. “Beginner’s Mind,” named for a Zen Buddhist concept, pleas for the inner child.
Though presented in the simple rock form, heavy on synthesizer and keyboard ambience, “The People’s Key” is a concept album. The concept? The horribly broad human condition, revolving around the source of evil in humanity and its balance with good — hence the ubiquitous religious and Nazi references. It’s about the plight of the “everyman” and the discovery that everyone shares a similar struggle, that, “You’re not alone in anything/You’re not unique in dying,” as said in “Ladder Song.” It’s about empathy, or as the John Goodman-esque voice says at the end, it’s all about “mercy.” It appears Oberst still believes in symmetry, as the album begins and ends with the idea of “I and I,” that when it comes down to it, we’re all the same; we’re all connected.
Oberst likes to tease audiences, do everything counter to expectations, leave stage before anyone is ready, but he always atones with a three or more song encore. I’m hoping “The People’s Key” is just a piece of what will be a simultaneously cathartic and mind-blowing end.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(03/02/11 10:46pm)
Within a run-down motel room in Oklahoma, the lives of two individuals are unhinged. The room, host to a microcosm of humanity, conveys the duality of fear — the terror of loneliness and of never being alone. Strangers, who take solace in each other’s existence, become infested by fear, infected by the knowledge that they aren’t ever truly alone. They wage a war with parasitic creatures that may or may not exist, which culminates in a final expression of their insanity. But are they really insane?
The Don Evans Black Box Theatre hosted All College Theatre’s production of “Bug” by Tracy Letts on Feb. 23 through 26. Directed by Daniel Student and assistant director John Cherney, junior psychology major, the play took the form of a pointillist painting — the details coalescing to form an incredibly raw, human image.
The use of space in “Bug” established the disconnect between the characters. The distance between Agnes (Sarah Stryker, senior philosophy and fine arts double major) and Peter (Graham Mazie, freshman computer science major) accomplished the initial awkwardness between them, further evidenced in the fact that they do not embrace face to face throughout the play. From cheap wallpaper to a closet full of boxes and clothes to a functioning bathroom, the set exuded a quality of exhausted occupancy. Yet, the symmetry of the room — two lamps, two
doors — maintained the motel room identity.
Blurred, purposely, were the subjects of this picture. Mazie played Peter, a former soldier who is being “hunted” by the government for knowing too much. Mazie was terrifying, as he evolved from the painfully awkward stranger at the beginning of Act I, to the obsessive, homicidal paranoid battling an ambiguous bug infestation with Agnes in Act II. He conveyed this consuming instability in every movement and word, especially in his psychopathic laugh while wrenching a tooth from his mouth.
Stryker played Agnes, a woman who lives in a motel, living in fear of her ex-husband Goss (Dan Loverro, sophomore biology major). Stryker’s presence expressed the defeated loneliness of Agnes. Her dishevelment, combined with her tenderness toward Peter, communicated her desparation and vulnerability.
The reintroduction of Goss throughout the play interposed the supposedly real-world threat alongside the fantastical danger devouring Agnes and Peter in the motel room. Loverro’s swagger embodied the abusive husband persona. Liz So, junior women’s and gender studies major, as Agnes’ friend R.C. provided much needed comedic relief throughout the play, delivered with a convincing southern accent. Junior English major Justin Mancini played Dr. Sweet, a psychologist that attempts to convince Agnes that the bugs tormenting her and Peter are a shared delusion. Mancini’s robotic manner and slow, calculated movements signaled his perhaps untrustworthy nature.
The uncertainty of who is to be trusted in the play also derived from the relevancy of Peter’s rants. Though the idea of the government planting living microchips into its soldiers seems preposterous, the implications of some of Peter’s speeches spoke of less fantastical concepts, such as the status quo. He tells Agnes: “It’s the way things are. It’s the rich get richer, the poor get poorer. They devised a plan to manipulate technology, economics, the media, population control, world religion, to keep things the way they are.”
Though much of the play adopted this dark, satirical tone, ACT beautifully achieved the juxtaposition of humorous instances. With Dr. Sweet’s dead body lying on the ground, and Agnes and Peter discussing their roles as the government’s pawns, a knock is heard at the door: It’s the pizza delivery guy. Stryker and Mazie built the intensity of the preceding moments so effectively that this incident’s contextual absurdity was magnified tenfold.
Advertisements for “Bug” cautioned audiences of the graphic nature of the play and perhaps, most notably, the full-frontal nudity. The nudity proved essential to the effect of the play’s poignant conclusion. Agnes and Peter are stripped to their most basic, most human forms. Peter unravels the “delusions” of reality, and in a raw expression of humanity, the inverted Adam and Eve turn what was once their infested prison into an inferno of freewill.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(03/02/11 10:27pm)
If you live in a house usually rented to students, it’s likely that you don’t live in a palace. And your house probably isn’t well insulated, which will likely translate to one horrible discovery: You are not alone.
No, I don’t mean anything of the paranormal variety.
Even if you are a conscientious cleaner, pests can become a problem. If you are slightly less careful, things may get out of control.
Your mom was right. Leaving food out is an invitation for vermin (or varmint if your mom watched too many Looney Toons). You think you’re more clever than a mouse? You think that hiding food in elevated locations makes it safe? Nothing is safe. Boxes and bags aren’t actually barriers. Mice are crafty. If you have food anywhere, they will find it. Invest in Tupperware and bins to store unrefrigerated food.
For a temporary solution, buy traps to put in particularly troublesome areas. Selecting the right traps is somewhat counterintuitive: the more low-tech the better. The secret chamber, no mess, out-of-sight-the-mouse-might-as-well-not-exist traps simply don’t work. Yes, it’s gruesome, but the simple wooden-plank and metal of death combination works best. And don’t use cheese. Peanut butter is far more alluring. Of course, the process is somewhat psychologically damaging. So it goes.
Alien bugs, bugs that appear more dinosaur or lobster than insect, will creep from crevices in the wall, trap you in the bathroom, evade capture with their cunning. Cave crickets are perhaps the worst of these critters. They tend to dwell in cool, damp locations, according to the Orkin website. And my bathroom. They aren’t lucky but are impossible to kill. Find someone in your house to designate as cave cricket/other ridiculously horrible insect hunter. Also, if need be, ladies, abandon feminism momentarily and find a boy to take care of the problem. Just milk that — I can make demands because of my gender but get offended when a male does the same — double standard as much as possible. Disclaimer: I believe men and women deserve equal treatment … as long as it suits me.
Ultimately, you should talk to your landlord. New Jersey landlord-tenant law guarantees the “warranty of habitability,” meaning that the landlord must provide “safe and decent” living conditions, according to the Legal Services of New Jersey website. So, instead of lamenting to everyone that you live in filth and squalor, tell your landlord you are having habitual pest problems. Maybe then people will start returning your calls and willingly come to visit. Maybe. Throw the ’ol book at your landlord, if need be. Remind them (politely) of their responsibilities. Don’t wait until the squirrels in the walls multiply, and you suddenly have baby squirrels crying at all hours of the day. Falling asleep to sounds of scampering (not cute) and scratching also takes its toll on the psyche. Remember, just because you’re playing house, doesn’t mean you need to be a “real” person just yet. Not (really) your house, not your problem.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(02/24/11 4:14am)
The Mercer County Superior Court dismissed allegations of race-based discrimination against the College and three white Campus Police officers on Feb. 1, according to lawyer Mark Pfeffer, who is representing the three black Campus Police officers involved — Security Officers Wayne Evans and Armond Harris and Police Officer Lorenzo Shockley.
Pfeffer said in an e-mail that he and his clients will be filing an appeal with the Appellate Division of the Superior Court, which he anticipates will take a year to decide.
The lawsuit, which was filed in June 2008, stemmed from complaints filed by Evans, Harris and Shockley. After investigating charges of derogatory behavior and determining that “some form of racial discrimination had occurred,” the College issued Sgt. Raymond Scully and Officers Matthew Mastrosimone and Kevin McCullough six and two-day suspensions, respectively, according to a deposition by Vivian Fernandez, associate vice-president for Human Resources. Court depositions and testimonies given by other members of the Campus Police Department indicate that the defendants indirectly learned of the plaintiffs using “racial-ly charged nicknames and
slurs” — such as “shadows” and “chocolate chips”— in reference to them.
Though dismissed, the issue is far from over.
“We wouldn’t be filing an appeal unless we believed the judge erred in her ruling on the defendants’ motions,” Pfeffer said.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(02/24/11 4:00am)
It’s that time of year again. Bright-eyed, accepted children wander through our campus — whether willingly or dragged by their bargain-shopping parents — following a backward-walking navigator. They will decide if this is the place to host the “time of their lives.” Princeton rejectees and barely made-its alike will make an incredibly important decision, heavily based on aesthetic presentation. Oh, sure, we’re supposedly Ivy League on a budget, the T.J. Maxx of higher education. Our students are allegedly among the happiest. But our campus is pretty. It is. And judging by the pervasive dependency on physical appearance in society, the exterior of a college campus likely plays a part in college selection.
But is beauty only skin deep?
I won’t lament the details excluded from the introductory campus tours — mediocre food, ubiquitous student apathy, surplus of stupidity, etc. — but I fear for the high school seniors influenced by the “package” presented by the College and all other colleges for that matter. These institutions advertise, and 18 year olds are expected to make life-altering decisions. After financial and performance aspects eliminate certain options from a prospective students’ possible schools, what is left to determine which school will serve he or she best? Is the experience supposed to be akin to the finding your wizarding wand? Does the school choose you?
A recent article appearing in The New Yorker, “The Order of Things,” by Malcolm Gladwell, compares the ranking of colleges by semi-respected sources, such as U.S. News & World Report’s annual “Best Colleges,” to car reviews, in their lack of depth and sagacity. How is anyone to make a prudent decision, when perceptions of colleges and universities are so shallow?
The College didn’t inspire the shimmering, windblown visit to Ollivander’s in me. My freshman year, I fought the urge to run up to groups of potential future students and scream, “Don’t do it! Get out while you can!” I’ve since made my peace with the College. Though in a slightly less mad-woman manner, I still feel the need to warn future generations: Don’t make my mistakes. I was guilty of frequenting web pages detailing school ranking. When the deadline for decision approached, my verdict came down to which school seemed more prestigious, appeared academically driven and didn’t give me cult-tingles (sorry Rider, but that whole “touch the Rider rock” thing fiercely freaked me out). I didn’t consider the decision as thoroughly as I should have.
Whether it was my defeatist attitude or my unrealistic expectations of college, I found myself disappointed with what was supposed to be the “time of my life.” I thought I’d learn everything at college. Everything. In my spare time, I’d discuss literature with my classmates and engage in philosophical debates with strangers. The College isn’t really that kind of place.
Then again, even if I’d spent years researching schools, I doubt that I could’ve obtained an accurate idea of what being a student at any school actually meant. The tools provided to potential students are grossly limited. Anyone can look good on the Internet, then turn out to be a 35-year-old man who lives with his mom. Separating fallacy from fact is almost impossible, especially when the school appears physically true to their claims. Talking to current students (non-employed students who walk normal), I’m sure, helps. Then again, talking to a student like me, circa two semesters ago, probably wouldn’t have produced a positive testimony for the College. I suppose everyone goes into the process somewhat blind. How anyone sifts through the propaganda and finds a “perfect fit” is beyond me. Perhaps I just have a problem with commitment.
—Katie Brenzel
(02/24/11 2:44am)
In the beginning of your on-campus living career, the College attempted to pair you with someone you wouldn’t strangle. You completed a survey to assess potential compatibility — Are you a morning person? Are you a smoker? How do you feel about your roommate using intravenous narcotics while blasting Tupac at 2 a.m.? These surveys seem to lack some crucial questions. Luckily after this first year, you’re granted the freedom to choose with whom you share living space. But even then, problems can arise.
Living with one person requires a relative compromise of lifestyles. You learn to adapt to each other’s personalities, schedules, morning rituals, etc. When more people are added to this equation, harmony is harder to accomplish.
I’d like to take a more optimistic view of “people” than Sartre, but the reality is: No matter how lovely your housemates may be, your place of residence isn’t a utopia. It can’t be. Off-campus living, in all its “I’m an independent woman/man!” glory, has its hellish moments. The causes vary, of course, but differing schedules and study habits can be cause for conflict. Don’t wait until you find yourself, silent and sleepless, in a cycle of infinite insomnia, with no exit in sight.
Whether you are a social butterfly, a hermit, a party animal or just inclined to behave like a grandma when it comes to noise, it’s essential that you identify how you and your housemates will interact. If you are the stay in your room — be it for studious or Facebook stalking purposes — type, make sure you strategically select your room before moving in. Which space has the most party-potential? Sleep in the farthest room from this place. Talk to your housemates and voice your concern. Explain your propensity as a buzzkill, and they will likely agree it’s for the best.
If and when your social activity (or lack thereof) conflicts with your housemates’ respective schedules, be respectful. When noise is preventing you from sleeping or studying, request that they bring it down a notch. Explain your circumstance and be polite. There’s no need to make demands (unless it persists). Sometimes passive aggressiveness and self-sound-suffocation via pillow just doesn’t cut it. Conversely, if your housemate needs to wake up for an 8 a.m. class, ignore the fact that it’s “Tuesday booze-day,” and try to keep your guests at a reasonable volume. College students don’t just need beauty sleep; they need recuperative hours from mental and bodily destruction.?Being civil and conscientious about each other’s schedules can prevent matters from
getting ugly.
Also to be considered are hygiene schedules. To avoid brawls over the shower, learn each other’s morning schedules. Discuss what time your housemates plan to wake up and work out who gets first dibs. Don’t wait for a cacophonic chorus of simultaneous alarm settings and a subsequent race to the bathroom. If you are particularly concerned about showering in time for class (and perhaps, slightly psychotic — guilty), learn who takes what my father refers to as “Hollywood showers,” and plan to snag shower time before this person. This will likely require waking up earlier, so decide which is more important — sleep or social interaction. If the former, you can also always wear your dishevelment like a rebellious testimony to your alternativeness. Just invest in some scarves and fake glasses. BAM, instant hipster. As for social interaction, just pretend that you’re better than everyone. Someone’s bound to believe it.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(02/17/11 1:05am)
With classes, clubs, homework and other activities consuming all hours, it may be easy to remain immersed solely in the microcosmic campus community. For those whose schedules demand locations beyond walking distance, however, leaving campus hinges on a number of factors: navigating public transportation, parking privileges, car ownership, etc.
The NJ Transit #601, which travels to Trenton Transit Center, stops at the College near Brower Student Center 20 times on a given weekday, 13 on Saturdays and seven on Sundays, according to the NJ Transit website. The route includes four scheduled stops between the two locations.
Many on campus, however, find the available modes insufficient, according to a survey orchestrated by senior civil engineering major Erin Dovel for her transportation engineering class. Responses from Dovel’s Qualtrics survey indicate particular grievance with the 601 bus. Issues that appear consistently throughout the 57 personal responses at the end of the survey include concerns of safety, over crowded-ness, uncleanliness, unreliability and tardiness.
“I absolutely hate riding the 601 bus,” one respondent said. “Even if it arrives on time (which is very rare), the driver usually saunters into the (BSC) for 10 to 20 minutes before leaving. I always end up flat out running to catch my train at the Trenton Transit Center, no matter how much extra time I leave to account for the unreliable bus system … Unreliable mass transit is actually one of the reasons why I no longer live on campus.”
Of the 163 total respondents, only 54 percent answered that they had taken the 601 bus before, while 46 percent indicated that they hadn’t. However, 89 percent said they’d favor establishing a bus with a route to Trenton Transit Center with minimal stops, and 86 percent indicated that they’d be more likely to use NJ Transit buses if offered a student discount.
The College has considered introducing systems comparable to those at other New Jersey schools, such as Princeton University, which provides its students with “safe, convenient and reliable transportation throughout the Princeton campus and surrounding community” via TigerTransit, states the school’s website. According to Emily Dodd, communications officer for Media Relations & Marketing, the College conducted a “multi-modal transportation study” in 2006 via a grant from the Department of Transportation, to assess the campus’ need for a “specialized independent College bus system or network.” However, the results of the study ultimately didn’t indicate such a need existed, Dodd said in an e-mail. She said that the criteria for establishing an independent system “depend on both the demand and willingness of the members of the campus community to abandon their cars and use public transportation.”
Other goals, however, emerged from the suggestions of the study. The President’s Climate Committee (PC3) completed the Carbon Action Plan, which Dodd said, “identified transportation as a fertile area to achieve carbon emission reductions.” As a result, a subcommittee — led by political science professor Brian Potter, is charged with investigating ways to reduce greenhouse gas emissions from the College’s use of transportation, Potter said. Two avenues for reduction, he said, include improving transportation to and from local train stations and encouraging carpooling. The work of the group will be presented to PC3, and if approved, will be presented to the campus community.
For many, transportation from the College is crucial to branching out beyond the bounds of the campus. According to a 2009 graduate survey conducted by Career Services, 74 percent of the 490 who responded said they’d participated in internship, practicum or clinical experience and of this number, 94 percent said they’d interned as an undergraduate.
The survey indicated that 29 of these internships were located in New York City and eight listed were in Philadelphia. The fare from Trenton Transit Center to New York Penn Station is $15.50, one way, and $15 from Hamilton Train Station to New York; it’s $8.75 from Trenton to 30th Street Philadelphia, according to the NJ Transit website.
NJ Transit offers a University Partnership Program, which provides up to a 25 percent discount for NJ Transit monthly passes to full-time college students. Fifty-two universities and colleges participate in this program — including Rider University, Rutgers University and Princeton University — but the College is not among the participants.
Though Dovel’s survey didn’t specifically touch on train discounts, some of the personal responses voiced desire to establish such a discount.
“I took the 601 to the Trenton Transit Center often during my freshman year, to visit my boyfriend at Rutgers,” one respondent said. “I enjoyed riding the bus. Never had any bad experiences on it. Now that I have my car on campus, though, I probably wouldn’t take the bus/train route to Rutgers again — with or without a discount on 601 fare. This has nothing to do with the buses; it’s because the train fares this year are too expensive. If there was a train fare discount, I’d be all over that.”
(02/10/11 1:53am)
Remember that maid your mother always claimed didn’t exist? Well, presuming she or he exists in your off-campus house is even more delusional and disastrous.
With no one to threaten car privileges, you’ll rapidly discover that the dishes will pile up and the bathroom will transform into a veritable jungle of dropped toothpaste and clogged drains. ?What happened? You aren’t slobs! You and your housemates are relatively clean-looking people. Why, then, do you live in filth? It’s an enigma, really, but with thorough investigation, may be unraveled.
No one’s ever taken out the garbage because there are designated garbage days, all of which were missed. Who knew? The kitchen should be condemned. You just discovered you have a lint catcher in your dryer. Now would be ideal to locate the fire extinguisher. Do you even know if you have a plunger? Sooner or later, you’ll find out.
Ordering people to clean is a dangerous game, one that delves into you’re-not-my-mother territory into full-blown where’s-the-goddamn-Windex wars. Diplomatic divisions of work may seem like the logical next step. Charts or chore wheels may prove an organized, clinical approach to the disaster at hand. Except they don’t work.
You may make a colorful wheel of work and believe that dividing and alternating tasks is perhaps the most beautiful concept in the world. Everyone agrees, the chore arrow/olive branch is positioned and figurative handshakes abound because, really, who shakes hands anymore? Week one comes and ends and, lo and behold, nothing has been done. Week two, the wheel is stagnant. Week three, and portions of the wheel have “disappeared,” leaving the now insulting contraption like a mediocre grade on the refrigerator. “A” for
effort, I suppose.
If you are able to make variations of the “wheel” work, you’re a saint. Otherwise, a slightly less-organized rhythm must be established. If you clean up after yourself and clean common areas periodically, you are above reproach. Hopefully, others will follow suit. If it seems ages since you cleaned something, it’s most likely your turn.
When someone doesn’t seem to be pulling his or her weight, it’s always better to discuss this issue directly with said person, without seeming like you are attacking or lecturing the person, rather than voicing outrage to everyone else. It may seem an obvious system but easily strayed from.
I’ve heard, second-hand, of a house that
handles similar issues by holing a periodic “Real Time,” where the housemates discuss any issues — thereby “getting real”— in a casual, beer accompanied setting. I haven’t experienced “Real Time,” but it apparently works. House meetings don’t seem as successful. Perhaps due to connotation or a deficit of “real.”
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(02/10/11 12:50am)
After a few months of Sodexo-provided bagels, the existence of real bagels may slip from your memory, just as real pizza, macaroni and cheese and sushi are nearly forgotten out of repetition.
In honor of National Bagel Day this Feb. 9, however, local establishments deserve some light. Please note: Dunkin Donuts’ bagels don’t qualify as bona fide bagels, though to those pedestrians — freshmen especially — who make the weekly, Route 31 pilgrimage: I know and feel your pain. However, those who can drive or coerce friends with cars, be wary: After enjoying the savory morsels provided by the following locales, you may find it difficult to settle for the Library Café.
For an elemental bagel selection consisting of the primary flavors — plain, sesame and poppy seed, etc. — New York Bagel Shop and Deli (1097 Parkway Ave.) offers a fairly authentic New York bagel shop atmosphere — complete with grease and primitive seating. This being said, the venue may or may not be suited to your dining-in preferences. However those craving deli style sandwiches or just a basic, everything with cream cheese on the go, New York Bagel may be your best bet.
Those with more daring taste buds should venture slightly further to satisfy their carbohydrate needs. Maidenhead Bagel Co. (2645 Lawrenceville Rd.) in Lawrenceville (exit 7b off of U.S. Route 95 North) has an incredible assortment of bagels and sandwiches. Perhaps the most unusual is the Burkum, a sandwich consisting of porkroll (but really Taylor Ham, South Jersey), egg and cheese placed on the pièce?de résistance, a glazed donut. Perhaps unsurprisingly, Lawrence school students created the sandwich. As a vegetarian (and an individual with a sensitive gag reflex), I unfortunately can’t provide a firsthand experience with the Burkum. However, Maidenhead’s spinach bagel is delicious, especially when combined as an egg and Swiss cheese sandwich. The shop’s whole wheat everything bagel is a bit overzealous in the salt department but is crammed with, well, everything, which can easily be countered by generous amounts of cream cheese — especially of the vegetable variety.
Pennington Bagel (25 U.S. Route 31) is home to the bagel to rule all bagels. The bagel to end all others — the asiago cheese bagel. The cheese baked into and onto the bread makes for a culmination of flakiness and crunchiness, a salty, but slightly sweet experience. If the Pillsbury Doughboy and a bread bowl at Panera Bread had a love child, it would be this bagel. Another variation of this bagel sometimes available is the swiss cheese bagel, which I recommend be combined, again, as a Swiss cheese and egg sandwich. On my not-so-adventurous (a.k.a lower self-esteem days), I opt for the whole wheat everything bagel, which is less salty than Maidenhead’s version, though not as decorated.
Though these locations offer many delectable options, I must mourn the absence of my ultimate favorite, the Black Russian bagel, which is usually a pumpernickel bagel with
walnuts and raisins, topped with sesame seeds. Maidenhead very rarely makes a batch of these godly morsels, though workers said that they can make them upon request. As a self-proclaimed Black Russian snob, these special requests are simply not worth the foresight nor the additional effort. And to every bagel establishment employee who has impatiently tried to convince me to settle for a plain pumpernickel bagel, I say: They are never the same and never will be.
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.
(02/03/11 5:27am)
Imagine — a sitcom that doesn’t depend on canned laughter to cue when something funny has been said. Logic would follow that such gems thrive. Evidenced by the allowance of such a creature as Snooki to publish a book, this is not a logical society.
After three years, three seasons and 53 episodes, Fox Broadcasting Company did the unthinkable, committing a great crime against humanity. “Arrested Dev-elopment” was canceled.
Despite the show’s many accolades — six Emmys, one Golden Globe and numerous other nominations — despite the incredible writing, brilliant timing and hilarious cast, “people” apparently weren’t watching. Shows fall victim to poor ratings regularly, and many times with merit, but sometimes the decision is tragic. “Freaks and Geeks” ended after one season. It’s a warped system of survival of the fittest, given that “16 and Pregnant” is embarking on its second season and “Two and a Half Men” is on its eighth. What a world.
The one benefit of canceling a show in its prime is it ends with grace, rather than outliving its appeal or its writers’ ability to produce — such as “Scrubs,” “The Simpsons” and now even “The Office” — but I believe “Arrested Development” was taken before its time. Fox made a huge mistake.
The show, narrated by Ron Howard, created an incredibly relatable, but unconventional picture of familial dysfunction. Michael Bluth (Jason Bateman) plays the levelheaded middle child, charged with keeping his family from falling apart in the wake of the arrest of his father, George Bluth Sr. (Jeffrey Tambor), while attempting to raise his son, George Michael (Michael Cera), alone.
His twin sister, Lindsay (Portia de Rossi), who is
chronically unemployed but high maintenance, moves in with Michael, along with her rebellious daughter Maeby (Alia Shawkat) and her stereotypically homosexual (but actually heterosexual) husband, Tobias (David Cross).
Will Arnett is Michael’s older brother Gob, an aspiring magician and Segway enthusiast. Their mother, Lucille (Jessica Walter), is the alcoholic conspirator of the family, who lives with her youngest son, the sheltered and emotionally disturbed Buster (Tony Hale).
Corruption, adultery, fraud, treason, kissing
cousins — the family is fucked up. As Michael mends his father’s company, the family sabotages his efforts. Though the show functions on a hyperbolic depiction of dysfunction, the characters ultimately seem to shrug off the chaos and accept the circumstances, which produces the modestly hilarious tone of the show.
So, Lucille has an affair with her husband’s stoner twin brother. A rogue seal eats Buster’s hand. Big deal. Gob uses the “The Final Countdown” as his magic show theme song. So, Tobias wears cutoffs under all his clothes and thinks he’s a member of the Blue Man Group. The ridiculousness escalates as the series progresses, but it’s an accepted reality throughout.
The comedy derives from the individual performances — especially by Arnett — and the absurdity of the situations. This is what a sitcom, by fundamental definition, is supposed to accomplish. Why then are such abominations on network television permitted to exist while this is not?
I’m not sure I want to be part of a world that cancels “Arrested Development” and allows anything on MTV to remain. I’m tired of changing the channel after a show is over and feeling as if I were emerging from a coma.
I suppose I will just have to wait for the indefinitely scheduled “Arrested Development” movie, wandering with my head downcast in a Charlie Brown shuffle to “Christmas Time is Here.”
Katie Brenzel can be reached at brenzel2@tcnj.edu.