Tony Peroni
Correspondent
It’s the spookiest time of the year! Pumpkin spice is in the air! Spirit pop-up shops line strip malls across the nation and the turning foliage reminds us all how our youth is fleeting and what was once beautiful must come to a cold, hard end. It’s almost Halloween!
But wait, what day is it? Oct. 30? Wow! That really crept up on me! I’m a hard-working college student who can barely keep his head above the water! I don’t have time to plan my silly baby costumes for Halloween parties! What to look like? The time-keeper who holds all the time in the world in my clammy and wrinkly mitts? Absolutely not!
You didn’t ask for it but here is The Chip’s Top 10 Last Minute Halloween Costumes
10. Rick Sanchez from “Rick & Morty.” Ok, this one is pretty epic. Alls you need to do is ask one of your STEM friends for a lab coat. Haha guess what! Wubbalubba dub dub! You’re Rick from “Rick & Morty!” But beware, this costume may be a little niche. The only people who really watch “Rick & Morty” are, like, really really smart.
9. Three Hole Punch. Jim from “The Office.” This one is sleek, simple, smart and sexy. Everyone will look at you and go “Hahaha, wait wow … wait, no way, you’re three hole punch Jim from ‘The Office.’” Guaranteed.
8. Shrek/Fiona from “Shrek.” Crack out the spray paint, this ones gonna get messy! For this one, you’ll need to go to your local hardware store and purchase their finest can of green spray paint. A more swampy/lime green is good for accuracy, but any old shade will get the trick done. Don’t worry about the clothing, this costume is for you to put your own spin on things. Do you wear SUPREME? Be Hypebeast Shrek! Do you like baseball? Be Yankee Fan Fiona! Remember to recycle your paint cans, and keep it green.
7. Frat Guy. Just wear your letters.
6. Mummy: Destroy your housmate’s supply of toilet paper. Wrap up!
5. Error 404. OK, so this one is for all my CompSci majors out there!!! Buy a $30 t-shirt from the mall that says “404: Costume Not Found!” I don’t know what it means, I’m not a big computer guy. I still write on a typewriter.
4: The Number 4. I don’t know how, but you can figure it out.
3. Ceiling Fan. Haha, no, you’re not gonna be some sports fan rooting for a team called “the Ceilings.” You’re going to rip your actual ceiling fan off of your ceiling. Glass will get everywhere. Everyone will be mad. It will be all your fault. But hey, you may just win best costume.
2: John Belushi from “Animal House.” Write the words “COLLEGE” on a sweatshirt
- The 2020 nominees for the Democratic party. You and 15 to 20 of your closest friends will dress up as the nominees. You will all stand shoulder-to-shoulder at the party yelling over each other about who has the best guac recipe, as well as fierce debate over whether or not freshman should throw fives at the door.
Whether your costume is last minute or a project coming to fruition, be sure to have a safe and happy Halloweekend. Halloween is scary, but so is the world we live in. Trick or Treat!
