The Signal

Serving the College since 1885

Saturday June 15th

Miss Misery

(Navya Sinha / The Signal).

From a Basement: Students realizing classmate crushes aren’t as cute without their masks

Refreshed from a relaxing spring break, Harper James was eager to return to the business building. However, her excitement had little to do with the next lesson in her BUS200 class; she had instead been anticipating seeing her long-time class crush, Jerry Seinfeld, without the mask covering half of his gorgeous face. Much to her dismay, though, when Harper re-entered the classroom she could not find her dear Jerry amongst the crowd of newly exposed faces. She recalled his usual seat and narrowed her focus there where her gaze was met by that of a man she did not recognize, yet one who greeted her as though they had long been acquainted. 

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From a Basement is a satirical column written by Miss Misery. This fictional piece is about fraternities and hazing (Navya Sinha).

From a Basement: Campus fraternity proud to take a stand against hazing; emotional abuse on the other hand…

Disclaimer: This is a satirical piece and does not reflect real individuals or events. Concern regarding the dangers of hazing has been on the rise in recent years. With more individuals involved in Greek life, criticizing it as an outdated and sadistic tradition, fraternities and sororities have had no choice but to respond. A clear message was being sent: get with the times or get left behind.

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From A Basement is a satirical column written by Miss Misery. This piece touches on the topic of inevitable icebreakers and the trauma dumping that they may sustain (Navya Sinha).

From a Basement: Student unsure where the line between ‘icebreaker’ and ‘trauma dumping’ is

The start of a new semester opens the door for an abundance of possibilities — joining a new club, taking new classes, starting a new job — all of which come with the unfortunate caveat of having to meet new people. Perhaps you would consider yourself to be a “people person,” yet even those fond of meeting new people can concede that the typical small talk in “getting to know you” type conversations can be tedious.

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